A father charges into the bathroom

a father charges into the bathroom and starts yelling at his son “son! how
many times have i told you not to do that? stop it! if you keep doing that,
you’ll go blind!”
the son replies: “i’m over here, dad.”
his son puts a guy into a nursing home. he doesn’t know if he’s going to like
it at first, but he decides to give it a shot for his son’s sake.
the first morning in the nursing home he wakes up with a hard-on. out of
nowhere, a beautiful nurse walks in, kneels down, and blows him without saying a
word.
the guy gets on the phone to his son and says, “son! i love this place! thank
you so much for putting me in this nursing home!”
the son says, “wow, pop. you sound really happy. what happened?”
the old man says, ” you won’t believe it. i woke up this morning with a
hard-on, and the most beautiful nurse i’ve ever seen in my life came into my
room and blew me. didn’t say a word. just blew me.”
“well, that sounds great, dad. congratulations.”
“well, thank you, son,” the old man says, and hangs up the phone.
later that day, the old man is walking down the hall in his walker. he slips
and falls and can’t get up. a big hillbilly orderly comes up to him, rips his
pants down, f**** him up the ass, and leaves him lying there in a heap.
the old man crawls to a phone and calls his son. “you got to get me out of
here, son. this place is nuts!”
“what happened, pop? you sound terrible!” says the son.
“well, i was walking with my walker and fell down and couldn’t get up. then
this big hillbilly orderly came by, ripped my pants down, and f***** me up the
ass!”
“well, you know, dad,” says the son. “you got a blow job this morning. you got
to take the good with the bad…”
“no, you don’t understand, son!” exclaims the old man. “i only get a hard-on
once a month! i fall down three, four times a day!”